My mother died in 2012 after a brief illness. When she went in for surgery to repair an aneurysm, we didn’t really expect complications. Although she was 87, she was still active and spry. Her mind was sharp. And she’d come through other recent surgeries with all flags flying. We didn’t expect that she would suffer a stroke during the surgery and end up with a few other complications that led to her death just a few weeks later.
My mom’s parents had both lived into their late 90s and I truly thought she would, too. I thought we had more time. That said, although there’s still a lot of sadness, I don’t have many regrets. We had a good relationship and I visited as often as I could, given that I had a family of my own to take care of and we lived 600 miles apart. I could’ve called more often, but I did make it a point to call her at least once a week. If I didn’t, she’d call me, concerned that there was a problem.
My father died some ten years before her, after a long and lingering illness. His passing wasn’t a surprise, but it still came on us too quickly, before we were ready. I suppose one is never really ready.
It took a while to get over the grief each time and there are still holes in my life that they used to occupy, but I’m reconciled to it now.
But I still buy my mom and dad a Christmas present. Every year, I buy chickens or a goat in their names for a needy family through the Food for the Poor (foodforthepoor.org) program. It’s a charity my mother had supported during her lifetime. I like to think it’s making them both happy where they are now to know that they’re still making an effort to help others in need.
And on a personal (and more commercial) note - I love writing Christmas stories of all kinds. I have a couple that are available for sale on Amazon and at most ebook outlets and one short story that's totally free.
A Vampire's Christmas Carol
Blue December - Amazon Kindle
Can You Jump-Start a Reindeer?
Free!
Karen, what a wonderful remembrance for your parents. I also lost both my parents around the time you lost yours. I don't think we ever get over that void. Our lives are sadder without them yet richer with their memories. Keep up the tradition of supporting the poor in your parents' names and your Christmases will always be blessed. Merry Christmas to your and your family.
ReplyDeleteA wonderful tribute, Karen. I lost both my parents more than a decade ago, but I have so many Christmas memories of them that I've kept their memories alive through my children with stories of how my father always went out on Christmas Eve to buy small treats for our stockings. Thank you for reminding me to keep them as precious members of our family.
ReplyDeleteHi Karen. I love the way you've kept your parent's memories alive. What a wonderful way to remember them each Christmas and what an impactful way to help a needy family. Merry Christmas to you and yours!
ReplyDeleteVictoria--
Love your way of keeping the memory of your parents' alive.
ReplyDeleteLove this, Karen. It's one of the sweetest holiday stories I've heard of - a great way to honor your parents and set a wonderful example for generations coming along.
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