What To Do About Unwanted Email

I’m known as the “computer guru” in the family since I spent twenty years as a computer programmer and have been running a web design/development business for the last ten years. That means I get asked all sorts of questions related to computer things. One recent question was about how to stop unwanted email.  This post is a slight expansion on my answer.

There are actually two different types of unwanted email and you need to respond differently to each.

If the unwanted emails are from a legitimate vendor you recognize, then you should use the unsubscribe link to get off the list.  Probably you signed up for the emails yourself and now, a few months and fifty unread messages later, you realize that was a mistake.  I get regular emails from a number of retailers where I’ve bought things and other groups where I’ve signed up for newsletters or notices about special offers.  You still need to be careful because there are spammers who make their messages look like they’re from legitimate groups.  Consider any message carefully before clicking on any link within it. But in general you’re okay clicking an unsubscribe link from those kinds of emails.

You shouldn’t even need to enter your email address if the system is set up properly; the email unsubscribe link should know who you are.  That doesn’t always happen, however, and you may have to enter the email address yourself. 

If it does ask you for an email address but doesn’t recognize it or it says you’re off and continues to send you email, then you should go to the site of the vendor, look up their “Contact” link (it’s usually buried at the bottom of the page) and find a customer service email.  Explain that you’ve tried to get off their email list and were unable to, then gently remind them that the CANSPAM act REQUIRES them to honor unsubscribe requests, and if you continue to receive unwanted emails you’ll have to report them as spammers.  Legitimate vendors DO NOT want to be reported as spammers. That should get their attention and some action.

The second group of unwanted email (and usually the larger group, unfortunately) is spam.  You should NEVER, NEVER, EVER click on ANY link in those (even what looks like an unsubscribe link).  NEVER open an attachment to an email if you don’t know what it is. At best it does nothing but confirm that yours is a valid email address that can be sold as part of email spam lists (yes, it is a big business!)  At worst, it can expose your computer to some very nasty malware.

I repeat: NEVER respond to spam in any way. Don’t reply to it and don’t click any links in the message. 

Spam is much harder to eradicate than unwanted newsletters, but there are some things you can do. Most email programs have a way to mark an email as spam and you should do that with any unwanted email that isn’t from a legitimate vendor.  Eventually your ISP or webmail provider should start to block those emails or divert them to a spam folder.

Most providers also have a “spam@”, “abuse@” or other similar email addresses.  If  you’re having a problem with a particular spammer, you should try to find the relevant email address for your email provider and forward the message to that address.

And as a hard line of defense against unwanted email and its sometimes dangerous payload, you should ALWAYS have virus protection on your computer if you’re on a PC, whether desktop or laptop.  There’s no excuse not to, since there are a number of good and effective free antivirus programs.  I’m not endorsing any of them, but here’s a link to a site that is constantly testing antivirus software.  Use it to evaluate your options: http://chart.av-comparatives.org/chart2.php   Here is PC Mag’s 2014 Antivirus recommendations.

I’ve used a couple of free antivirus programs that I’m very happy with – Malwarebytes (malwarebytes.org) and Avast (avast.com/). 

Your mileage may vary, of course; I’m not endorsing anything; and any other legal disclaimers needed are hereby invoked.

Author Bio:
Karen McCullough is a web designer by profession, and the author of a dozen published novels and novellas in the mystery, romantic suspense, and fantasy genres as well. She has won numerous awards, including an Eppie Award for fantasy, and has also been a four-time Eppie finalist, and a finalist in the Prism, Dream Realm, Rising Star, Lories, Scarlett Letter, and Vixen Awards contests. Her short fiction has appeared in several anthologies and numerous small press publications in the mystery, fantasy, science fiction, and romance genres. She has three children, four grandchildren and lives in Greensboro, NC, with her husband of many years. Her most recent release is the ebook version of A Gift for Murder, originally published in hardcover by Five Star/Cengage and mass market paperback by Harlequin Worldwide Mysteries.

Website: http://www.kmccullough.com
Blog: http://www.kmccullough/kblog
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/KarenMcCulloughAuthor
Twitter: https://twitter.com/kgmccullough

Zen and the Art of Doodling

It’s First Fridays, and thus, time to get creative… with zen doodling. It’s the latest rage! Okay, it’s not such a rage. More of a low murmur. And Okay, it’s not so new. In fact, it’s as old as the hills. But I’m “down with the kids”, and this is what they’re murmuring about this week: Zen Doodles.

What, you ask, is a zen doodle? (Pretend you asked.) Basically, it’s a doodle. It’s one big, complex, massive doodle. What’s the point of a zen doodle?

1. Meditative
2. Stress release
3. A plotting tool
4. Cool art to fill the pages of your journal.

It’s meditative, because it helps you to exercise moving from constraint to freedom. The only constraint is the page on which you’re doodling. Then you slowly add constraints – an outline of my hand was my constraint in this doodle (below). Then you free up again by doodling in one portion of it, then add constraint – a curve, a flower petal, a line – big and bold within the constraint of the hand, then within that constraint, you add another layer of free-form detail. (This, by the way, is a LOT like plotting a novel.)

It’s a stress release, because it requires very little attention. I did the hand while having coffee with the LWDC (Ladies Who Drink Coffee). As we chatted, I doodled.

It’s a plotting tool. I suffer (suffer?) from Attention Deficit Disorder or A.D.D. – an ugly, pejorative term that doesn’t really describe what it is to have ADD. I prefer to think of it as Attention Diversity Dilemma. Sure, one of its less pleasant side bars is the inability to focus – on stuff that other people want you to focus! I’m perfectly chill with focusing on what I want to focus. Sometimes I need to employ strategies… like zen-doodling. I write. My mind wanders. I doodle. I strum my banjo, (always close at hand), and then I turn back to writing. I have a goal of 1,000 words per day. That’s just four pages, approximately. I can do that – in and around Attention Diversity Dilemma. Would I be more productive without A.D.D.? Maybe. Who knows, but I’m certain I would be far less creative.

Here’s a little video book trailer I put together for one of my off-road books, (another hazard of A.D.D. – going off-track genre-wise). The entire book trailer is just one big giant zen-doodle! While writing the book, I created pictures – still shots of scenes that were playing in my head – then I used my words – a free-form expression of what I hoped to incorporate into the characters, the plot, etc., into the creation of the pictures. The zen doodle is the plot! I hope you enjoy the trailer, even if the book might not be exactly your cuppa tea. (Warning: It's young adult, paranormal, not cozy.) The book I'm writing now is a sweet romantic comedy loosely based on the play, Cyrano DeBergerac, by Edmund Rostand. I'll try to post some of the zen doodles on my blog at www.sofiecouch.blogspot.com as I journal the plot... soon. 

So, the next time you sit down to coffee with friends, pick up a pen, grab a piece of paper… and zen doodle. You never know where it may lead you.

Buzzing along with Elisabeth Rose

My car has an annoying little buzzing rattle. It’s on the passenger side so I can’t thump things and fiddle about trying to stop it while I’m driving. Of course, at traffic lights it stops so I can’t find it then either, and it stops when I go around a corner or a curve in the road.

It’s not the glove box cover or something inside the glove box. It’s not the trim along the dashboard although when my husband was a passenger he gave it an almighty thump and the noise stopped ( see February post about my husband’s solution to things that need fixing). Perhaps he temporarily frightened whatever it was because it was quiet for quite a long time after that attack.

It seems to come from the door or at least way across that side but it isn’t the blue collapsible umbrella in the side pocket on the door. Maybe it’s the air vent or the speaker for the radio.

Last summer I decided it was something in the seat because if I pulled on the side of the bit you sit on it stopped, so I shoved a glove down between the seat and the frame. Just the finger tips poked out and it looked as though someone was trapped under the seat trying to get out. When winter came I spent ages looking for the missing glove until I spied the little trapped person and remembered where it was.

This summer it seems worse but I haven’t remembered to shove the glove back into place until after I start on my way and then it’s too late.

I love Red Rover—my red VW Golf—but his rattle is very annoying. I think I need to get my husband back on board and drive about until we track this little pest down.  

Sweet contemporary romance from Escape and Montlake
Elisabeth's Amazon author page

www.elisabethrose.com.au

Coffee and Tea: Servants of the Muse?

by Janis Susan May/Janis Patterson

I don’t get it when someone asks “Do you like tea or coffee?”

I like them both, and drink both, but it’s amazing how different they are, both in perception or actuality.

For example, I can’t face the idea of a morning without coffee, and that means coffee made my special way. Liking my coffee fresh and hot, I have a single serving coffeemaker that actually uses regular ground coffee (French Roast brewed to industrial strength is my favorite) instead of those abominable little cups. If the sad day ever dawns that there is no such thing as a single serving coffee maker that uses ground coffee, I will either go back to my trusty French press or abjure coffee forever. Those horrid little cups are too inflexible, too limited and far too expensive!

Usually I prime the coffeemaker with water and grounds the night before, so that in my semi-conscious morning state all I have to do is push the button and allow the elixir of life to pour into the cup. Once that’s done, I add one packet of sweetener and a goodly dollop of flavored creamer. At the moment I’m in love with Vanilla Caramel, though French Vanilla and Caramel Macchiato are not far behind. Once my 14 oz morning mug is about half empty I am reasonably awake and functioning. By the time I reach the bottom of that first mug , the animals have been fed, The Husband’s lunch made and him sent off to work. Once he leaves, I can go to my writing.

By the way, my coffee mug is an ancient one purchased years ago from my local RWA chapter. It is bright blue, and written on it in large white letters is “Warning – what you do may end up in my next novel.” Sometimes I think it as much as the coffee keep me focused on the project at hand.

Usually by lunch I have had two or three mugsfull and that is a sufficiency unless it is brutally cold outside, in which case I will drink it all day. (My office is the coldest room in the house in the winter, more’s the pity.) Then I will switch to water, or sometimes a Diet Dr. Pepper or iced tea. Both Dr. Pepper and iced tea are pretty standard afternoon/evening drinks in Texas!

I don’t drink as much hot tea as I do coffee, but I like it as much or more even though to me it doesn’t have the same caffeine-jet-propelled pick-me-up as coffee.

I would never drink tea out of my big morning coffee mug. That would seem vaguely uncivilized. My late paternal grandmother bequeathed me her cup and saucer collection when I was just a baby. She began it not long before her wedding in 1899 and by the time I received it the collection totalled nearly 50 cups. My mother used it for years, during my childhood and well into my grown-up-with-my-own-apartment life. She even added to it – and she should have, because being a total klutz she broke almost a third of the original collection.

When, long after my majority, I managed to coax it out of her hands, I melded it with the collection I had started for myself. Trust me, I have lots of teacups and saucers. They’re all pretty, but only a few of the old ones are really valuable. Still, I get one or another of the collection out and use them occasionally just for the pleasure of it.

My tastes in tea are much wider than in coffee. A bag or two of English Breakfast or Irish Breakfast or Jasmine or Assam or Golden Darjeeling (my favorite!) in the pot, a pretty cup, a little sweetener and just a bare splash of milk is a recipe for sheer delight. There are no flavored creamers here – nothing should mask the distinctive flavor of the tea.

If I am feeling particularly decadent around break time, I make up a pretty tray complete with shortbread fingers and jamprint cookies and if it’s warm take the whole thing out to the pergola or if it’s winter, into my early Victorian parlor. I tune the radio to the classical station and for a half hour or so simply enjoy life. It’s invigorating and restorative. Somehow a cup of tea taken while working at the computer simply does not taste the same!

These are silly little rituals, true, but they are part of my daily writing life – and is not writing itself a ritual? It is with me, something I do every day, rain or shine, well or ill. Silly, perhaps, but the coffee and the tea and the work all balance each other and – Heaven knows! – we writers need all the help we can get!

Puppies, Kittens and Ponies

What is it about puppies and kittens and ponies (and even hamsters, though I have never had one) that we love?  Every jaunt through Facebook includes  adorable pictures of friends’ furry loves (my own included), heartwarming stories of  pets reunited  with their pet people, or passionate pleas for adoptive homes for animals in distress.

 

Most of my friends have pets. Most of my family and extended family are pet lovers, too.  I have two rescued cats and two noisy and happy parakeets.   Pets are like members of the family.  I like people who like and respect and protect animals.

So what does that have to do with romance novels?

I love to read sweet romance and light mysteries. I also like to write them.  I feel that a large part of the joy of our stories is directly related to the ability to identify with.. and LIKE the characters.  Though it may sound corny, in a good book, they actually feel like friends to me. Real. The kind of people I like.

I am seeing how the memorable characters in my favorite books (both romance and mystery) often have a pet that matters a lot to them.  Like Stephanie Plum and her hamster, Rex.  Or Jesse Stone and his big lovable dog. Jessie. This can also been seen in sweet romance movies, like Tom Hank’s adorable dog Brinkley in “You’ve Got Mail.”

  In many of my earlier books, my characters have pets too.  In “Daring Hearts”, my heroine helps a sad little boy get a puppy.  In “Love, Julie”, my heroine saves and trains a wild horse that people have given up on.  In “Noah’s Bark”, my heroine is a veterinarian who fights for animal rights and cares for a bevy of animals, usually with no pay. In “Patient Heart”, it’s all about an errant pony.

There is a certain kind of sweet loving heart that is open to loving a pet, and that trait is very attractive to me in a romance novel, as well as in real life.  In our sweet romances, the emphasis is on heart and character and story. The inclusion of pets often makes the story richer, more realistic and heartwarming to me. 

What do you think? Do you have a pet? Do you find stories richer with characters who love their pets?

Christine Bush is the award winning author of many books and novellas of sweet romance and light mystery. When she isn’t writing, she can be found working with clients as a Marriage and Family Therapist in private practice, or teaching Psychology at a local college.  She lives with her family and two crazy cats in northeastern Pennsylvania, and loves to hear from readers and aspiring writers.

www.ChristineBush.com

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Christine-Bush-Author/213919128638762

http://www.amazon.com/Christine-Bush/e/B001KHSLRG/ref=sr_tc_2_0?qid=1392688497&sr=1-2-ent

  

Check out her reissued Award Winning  book “Cindy’s Prince!”

http://www.amazon.com/Cindys-Prince-Christine-Bush-ebook/dp/B00IFSRVJ2/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1393781746&sr=1-1&keywords=christine+bush+cindy%27s+prince

PAINTING YOUR BOOK

 

Thinking back on my last vacation and if you factor out the great spa and all the massages, if you can, the best part of the trip was the Norman Rockwell Museum. I went on the tour and discovered that painting and writing are a lot like

Now at first that might sound strange, but if you think about it, writing and painting are closely connected. The painter is telling a story with his brush strokes much like we are telling a story with our keystrokes. And in both cases, it is up to the artist - whether it be the painter or the writer - to make sure that the details are strong enough to make the story being told connect with the observer or the reader and have he or she engage in the characters and feel the emotion.

Take this painting by Norman Rockwell. What do you see? A family dinner. Thanksgiving perhaps. It's actually one of the four paintings that compose Rockwell's majestic "The Four Freedoms" series. Maybe you'd stop a minute and look at the picture and then walk on. But let's look closely at this painting and "see" the story Rockwell is telling us.

In the painting is a large family gathered around their table. The occasion is probably Thanksgiving because of the huge turkey being served. Both the good china and the good silver are on the table. It’s probably Grandmother who cooked all day to make the feast.

The man in the center left is talking and everyone seems to be smiling in reaction to what he has said. The man in the lower right corner is looking at you, as though waiting for your reaction to the comment.

Grandpa is at the head of the table and has his carving tools ready to slice and serve the turkey. Grandma is placing the turkey in its place. She is still wearing her apron in case something spills and ruins her dress. The turkey appears to be cooked to perfection.

The table extends past the bottom of the canvas, giving the perception that the viewer is actually at the table. The man in the lower right corner of the painting also seems to be inviting you to join in the feast.

Rockwell used white as the main color on the table. But look at the details; the ice in the water, the ironed-in creases still visible in the tablecloth, the light and shadows on the crisp white dishes and serving pieces.

Another painting that tells an incredible story “in the moment” is called “Moving In” it is an example of how Rockwell used his artwork to spark thought and intrigue. The image focuses on a moving truck parked in the driveway as some resident children greet their new neighbors. It seems like an ordinary scene, but it tells an entire story in the matter of one single instant. Look closely.

Both girls are wearing pink to indicate similarities. Two boys have baseball gloves, one a baseball uniform – common interests. The black children have a white cat; the white children a black dog. Do you see the separation on the sidewalk? Two children are ready to cross the line. Very typical of the time frame. Do you see six figures in the painting? There are actually seven. One is in a window to the rear left, peeking out and ready to report to the neighbors. What happens next? Who makes the first more toward friendship?

Norman Rockwell had the gift of inviting us into his work and allowing us to share the story he was trying to tell. Isn’t that what we, as writers, hope to do also?

The advice we can gleam from a Rockwell painting is this – the details are very important, but they should never tell the observer or the reader what he is to experience. The details need to be subtle enough to set the scene and allow the observer to share the story with the artist (or writer) creating it.

Words to Inspire Teenage Girls

by Victoria M. Johnson

We've all experienced the angst and awkwardness of being a teenager.  What with acne, classmates who taunted us, parents who didn't get us, and homework that overwhelmed us, it's a wonder we made it out of high school with any self-esteem or confidence.  Yes, we had it bad but, in retrospect, the world didn't stop spinning as we thought it might.  And actually, I think teenage girls today have it much worse than we did.  They suffer through the same experiences as us but I believe they have far more stress nowadays.  What can we do as moms, sisters, aunts, or friends?  We can listen and we can speak inspiring words to the teen girls in our lives.  We can show our love and support through words that bolster and lift the spirit.  I'm sure we can all find encouraging words within our hearts to speak, but teen girls sometimes come with hard heads, don't they?  Sometimes they only hear it when the words come from someone else.  With that in mind, I've gathered up some powerhouse help.  I've called in the troops in the form of A-list artists whom your teens may identify with: Katy Perry, Kelly Clarkson, Pink, Christina Aguilera, Aretha Franklin, and Lee Ann Womack.  These talented women have recorded confidence-building, constructive, and affirmative songs for teen girls.  Teenagers love their music, right?  We may as well reinforce the good songs they're hearing through their earbuds.  Hearing these words, along with a strong hug will give any girl a boost of assurance.  Let's spread the girl power!

Roar by Katy Perry

"I went from zero, to my own hero"

Katy Perry's upbeat song is as empowering as Helen Reddy's I Am Woman was back in the 70s.  This song tells of a woman who was pushed around but she's had enough and she has the confidence to stand up for herself.  The message to pass on is: get back up when others try to knock you down.

  

Beautiful by Christina Aguilera

"You're beautiful, no matter what they say"

Christina Aguilera sings about not letting other's hurtful words get you down and about us being full of beautiful mistakes.  The message to pass on is: even if you make a mistake, you're beautiful anyway.

Breakaway by Kelly Clarkson

"I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly"
Through Kelly Clarkson we get inspiration to take a chance by making a change that allows us to reach for a better life.  The message to pass on: we don't know what the future holds but it's by taking a chance that we find our wings and opportunities. 

I Hope You Dance by Lee Ann Womack

"Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens"

This heartfelt song doesn't promise life will be perfect.  It speaks of life's setbacks but with the hope for keeping a positive outlook and adventurous spirit.  The message is: just because you've been disappointed, don't give up.    

Respect by Aretha Franklin

"R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to me"

This song demands respect to the point where Aretha spells it out to make it clear what she wants.  Although your teen likely doesn't know Aretha, these lyrics still resonate and stand the test of time.  The message to pass on: always expect to be treated with respect--you deserve it!

  

Perfect by Pink

"Change the voices in your head

Make them like you instead"

When all the above fails to lift the spirits of your teen, pull out Perfect aka F**ckin Perfect.  Why would I recommend a song with the "f" word in it?  Well you have the choice to hear it without the curse word, just listen to or buy the clean version.  Second, the song powerfully gets to the negative self-talk some teens have inside them.  And when it's the outside world that is being cruel, it might come as the best encouragement to hear a loved one say, "please don't believe those negative things.  Don't let anyone make you feel less than perfect."

Of course, sometimes the situation a teen is facing at school demands action and intervention.  That is when the principal is visited and/or the police are called.  This is where the listening comes in (and watching your teen's behavior) to make that determination.  In all cases, it's up to all of us to give inspiration and a fighting spirit to the young girls we love.  If you can't speak the words, play the song for her or print out the lyrics.  And don't forget to say, "I Love you; I'm here for you; Come and talk to me about anything, anytime!"

Did I leave out a song you find particularly motivating and uplifting for teen girls?  Let me know in the comments below.

Bio: Victoria M. Johnson knew by the time she was ten that she wanted to be a writer.  She loves telling stories and she's happiest when creating new characters and new plots.  Avalon Books and Montlake Romance published Victoria's fiction debut, The Doctor’s Dilemma, (A 2012 Bookseller’s Best double finalist).  Her other fiction book is a collection of romance short stories titled, The Substitute Bride.  She is also the writer and director of four short films and two micro documentaries.  Visit Victoria's website at http://VictoriaMJohnson.com for inspiration and tips and find her Amazon author page or connect with her on Pinterest and Twitter or Facebook.