What I'm Learning as a Grandmother

Before my grandson was born, I never really understood the hype about grandchildren.  We’ve all heard it. “Wait until you have grandchildren then you’ll see that there’s no greater joy,” would be a typical refrain. 

I thought I understood when my grand son was born a year ago.  Holding him for the first time in my arms was a wonder.  But there was, at least in my mind, such a build up about being a grandmother that my own reaction, albeit emotional, didn’t feel that it measured up to all the hype I’d heard.  Now I think I understand what the hullabaloo was about. 

What helped me was a quote shared in a yoga class I recently attended. The gist of it is that the biggest enemy of parenthood is life’s distractions. The remark resonated with me because I’d just come back from LA visiting my grandson.  I was alone with him a lot of that time. I got to pick him up from daycare every afternoon before my daughter got home from work and then spend the next few hours just focusing on him.  

My only responsibility, besides picking him up (in LA traffic) was dinner and that was easy.  My daughter had it waiting, plated, in the fridge.  She took care of his bath and bedtime routine when she got home. All I had to do was to drive in that traffic for fifteen minutes and keep him out of harm’s way for a few hours.

Every afternoon I could take him in his stroller along the canals in Venice and look for ducks or dogs.  Sometimes we went to the local fancy and over priced grocery store where everyone smiled at him. Sometimes we walked along the boardwalk beside the beach.

            I raised three children and spent a lot of time in grocery stores with them, taking them to the park and to the beach. But this was different.  When I was raising my children I had other responsibilities.  Besides meals there was the general upkeep of the house, the up keep of my family’s busy schedule and my writing.  I was always trying to find time to fit in an hour or two a week.  

It was also a time, more than thirty years ago, that most women stayed home and daycare really wasn’t an option.  I was raising my kids because that was my job and my husband was out working and leaving child rearing and home chores to me because that was, as we saw it back then, my responsibility.

            Spending time with my children when they were small wasn’t always as idyllic as it was with my grandson.  I’d get glimpses of it when I’d take them to the park the first time they’d go down a slide or sit on a see saw, or at home, just before bedtime when we’d curl up together with a favorite book.  

But there were also the distractions:  the list of things I needed and wanted to accomplish that filled my brain.  I think that’s the meaning of the quote I referred to earlier.  During those early years when I was raising my children, all those unimportant details of life, were always intruding and preventing me from being completely present.

Do I wish I could get a do-over?  Of course I do.  If I got one, I’d definitely focus more on the time with my children and less on picking up the house or worrying about the minor details of life or even my writing. But since there are no do-overs, at least I get to be a grandma and that’s pretty spectacular and maybe makes up for what I missed the first time around. 

Real (?) People in Books

by Sandra Carey Cody

One of the questions writers are often asked is: “Do you use real people in your books?”

There’s no simple yes or no answer to this question - at least not for me. My characters are cobbled together out of bits and pieces of a lot of people, myself included.  The old actor, Nathaniel Pynchon, introduced in Put Out the Light is a good example. He isn’t anyone I know. He’s arrogant and self-centered. He isn’t nice, but I think he’s interesting. He says and does the mean, hurtful things that I don’t allow myself to say or do.  And, frankly, it’s nice to have a place to release my nasty impulses where no one gets hurt.

Sometimes, a fictional character is the result of a glimpse of another human being. On a recent trip to the grocery store, I was in line behind a young woman with two children - a baby sitting in the seat of the cart and a little girl. I’m guessing the child was about six. When it was their turn at the checkout, the mother put their items on the conveyor, the store clerk rang them up, and, without being told to, the little girl started bagging the groceries. Young as she was, she knew what she was doing. First, she very carefully arranged an assortment of canned goods in the bottom of a bag, then she proceeded to place lighter, more irregularly-shaped items on the base she had constructed. When the bag was full, she selected another and filled it with the same meticulous precision. I watched, amazed, and wondered what her story was. Was she just naturally organized? Had her mother or another adult coached her? If so, for what reason? Old-fashioned character-training? Or had a special family situation made it necessary for her to pitch in beyond her years? Did the child enjoy what she was doing? Had she any sense of her uniqueness? She was certainly different from most of the kids I've encountered in checkout lines; there was no whining, no begging for some of the treats that stores place so enticingly at child-eye-level. I glanced at the mother. Apparently, she took the child’s help for granted. I don’t mean that she seemed indifferent. She smiled at the little girl and nodded approval, but didn’t seem to find her child unusual. 

This incident lasted no more than fifteen minutes, just a small interlude in a round of everyday errands, but it stuck in my mind. The child will probably show up as a fictional character some day. She'd make a perfect amateur sleuth - smart, competent, someone who slips under the radar and is under-estimated until it's too late. When the story is written, chances are her appearance and actions will be completely different than the incident I witnessed. To tell the truth, I don't remember how this particular child looked. I'm imagining pigtails, but that might change. I doubt I’ll use the supermarket setting but, wherever it unfolds, that little girl's spirit will be present.

            So ... back to the original question: Do I use real people in my books? I’m not sure. Every idea comes from somewhere and I suspect most writers would have a hard time tracing the finished product (or character) back to its genesis. 

Notes from a Sitting Duck

by Janis Susan May/Janis Patterson

They're out there, in droves, just waiting for us.

No, I'm not getting paranoid - any more than usual, anyway. Every day writers are being made into sitting ducks. I'm telling the truth, and I'm talking about thieves. Call them pirates, call them freedomers, call them file-sharers, call them plagiarists, call them anything you like, but they're still thieves, talking our work without our permission and giving us no compensation.

It's interesting that those who believe 'if it's on the internet it should be free' or that we should be happy just to have our work read and give away our work so freely have never published anything of their own. When we call them thieves to their faces they are offended and hurt; why, they ask, are we being so selfish? People want to read our books. People need entertainment. We have entertainment. How can we be so small of spirit, they wonder, as to deny people what they want when we have it. We want our work to be read, don't we?

Of course, they never stop to think - or plain just don't care - that we spend weeks, perhaps months, maybe even years writing that book. We spend money, too, if we're self-published, on editors and proof-readers and covers and formatters. That never seems to enter their tiny little brains. They just want to be seen as a kind of Robin Hood, graciously giving to the have-nots and never caring if it is at the expense of the ones who created the books.

Now of course you know I'm not talking about a writer who decides to give away a book of his own, either as a short-time sale, a long-term enticement to a series, a gift promotion, or a whatever. I have my own opinions about free books, but as long as the writer himself is the one making the decision to give it away, that's fine. It's their property and they can do what they want with it.

Another particularly slimy kind of thief is the one who gets a copy of the book and then puts it up for sale in his store... but without the author's permission and without any compensation going to the author. The reader gets the book, the seller gets the money, and the writer, who created the book, gets... nothing. Except for a very few mega-sellers, writers have always gotten the short shrift in the publishing industry and it looks like that's not going to change anytime soon.

A new wrinkle in this perpetual 'screw-the-writer' cavalcade is the plagiarist. Oh, people have been stealing books and ideas from other writers for centuries, but suddenly this kind of theft seems to have gone on steroids.

Now these thieves take chunks of copy from several books of similar genre, then mash them up into a new 'book' (perhaps 'manuscript' would be a better term) and put it out as their own. Sometimes they don't even bother to do their own 'mashing-up' but hire a ghostwriter to do it, so they can claim to have written a book without even having touched it. Even worse, there are thieves who take a book and leave it untouched except for changing the main characters' names, maybe the location and maybe the industry in which they work, then put it out as their own work.

And I have never ever heard of any legitimate writer getting any of the money owed them after the scams have been discovered.

In order to defend his property the writer has to spend time - time that should have been spent with his family, or writing, or whatever he chooses - chasing down these thieves and sendings DMCAs, or he has to spend money hiring a company to do it for them - money that should have stayed in the writer's pocket. What's worse is that most of these criminals operate from overseas, beyond the reach of law enforcement - if law enforcement would take an interest in piracy, which so far it hasn't. In the rare instance where an operator has closed down, you can bet within a month or so it will be back up and running again on another website, gleefully continuing to steal writers' property and profits.

I don't know where or how much farther this trend of thievery will or even can go, but I'm absolutely positive that somewhere someone will think of another way to rip off the poor writer who labors to create something.

Sad to think that the internet - which has given so many of us careers with the advent of self-publishing - is what has also given us this rise in crime. I'm sure that there was plagiarism and intellectual theft back in the day of gate-keepers/traditional publishing, but the purely physical limitations of print publishing kept it to a minimum. The internet and self-publishing has indeed turned out to be a two-edged sword.

I don't know what or how is to be done about this, but something must be. Surely someday some hot-shot computer person will come up with a theft-proof something or other that will give writers and writers alone control of their works. Hopefully it will happen soon, because writers are tired of becoming every crook's target.

Obligations and Wants

 by Fran McNabb

                      

            I’m excited to once again be back as a regular on Classic and Cozy taking the fourth Thursday of the month. If you follow the former Avalon authors on this group, you know that Leigh Verrill-Rys has filled this space for a long time. Like most of us on this blog, Leigh had to let go of some of her obligations to find time for other endeavors in her life. We’ve all been there. In fact, for the last year or so, I, too, stepped away from the blog to catch up with life, which brings me to the point: How do we know what is important in life?

As authors we all try to juggle the demands of living. Some of us might be raising children or grandchildren, some work full time, and all of us strive to enjoy life while still finding time to write. How does anyone find the time to do what is important to them?

I’m a retired teacher. When I worked, I seemed to be much more productive than I am now. How could that be? I was away from the house for over eight hours a day, had two boys who were active in school and in sports, and a husband who loved to fill our house with friends every weekend. Needless to say, life was interesting, yet I found time to write regularly. I think the key was time management and being organized. I had to write lesson plans, grade essays and tests, and most importantly, I had to be involved with my boys and their pastimes. And, yes, I had to write and I did.

Maybe because I was younger and had more energy, I was able to do everything, but besides that fact I think the key was making the decision that I wanted to be a published writer. After that decision, I carved out the time in my busy schedule. That time might have been four in the morning while the kids were still sleeping or in the middle of the night when I awoke with an idea. I’m not sure how I did it, but I’m sure determination played a big part.

Today I don’t work outside the home, but I seem to stay busy. Most things I do are not necessary, but they are things I want to do. I do want to write, but compared to my earlier years, I'm not as productive. So, back to my original point: How do we know what is important in life? That’s easy. No matter how old you are, family should come first. Their needs and wants are important, but then what we want to do should come next. If it’s finding time to write, then we should make sure that time is there. If it’s volunteering someplace, then find the time to do it. Wants are important. They are the things that keep life interesting and moving along.

So, Leigh, we all understand what you’re going through. I hope all of your life’s callings let you find time to write and to one day come back to Classic and Cozy.

FRAN MCNABB -  Fran lives along the Gulf Coast and often uses that setting in her books.

Presently she has nine published light romances. Her latest book, A SOLDIER'S HONOR  is also set on the coast. Come visit with Fran at www.FranMcNabb.com or contact her at mcnabbf@bellsouth.net

When Fact and Fantasy Merge

The last two posts here at Classic and Cozy, Victoria Johnson's February is for Fairy Tales and Janis Susan May's Fantasy, Myth and Formula, have been about fantasies and myths, in other words, writing that is rooted in our dreams, stories that stir our imaginations and help us to understand good and evil. I loved both posts. They started my mind on a journey about two birthdays we celebrate this month: George Washington and Abraham Lincoln. Though these two men are actual historical figures, with many documented accomplishments, a large part of their allure lies in the myths that have grown around them.

Perhaps the most well-known of these is George Washington's "I cannot tell a lie". Did he actually say that? No. The story first appeared in the fifth edition of Mason Locke Weems's biography, The Life of George Washington, published in 1806. Mr. Weems knew it wasn't factual when he included it in his book. He said that his plan was to tell Washington's history, then go on "to show that his unparalleled rise and elevation were due to his Great Virtues." I first heard the story when I was in elementary school (a very long time ago) and it's a pretty safe bet most of you did too. So, why is this little story, which most people know is not true, better known than most of the documented facts of our first president's life? Why has it lasted for more than two hundred years when many facts have been lost? It has the appeal of myth. It's a tangible example of the good we, as Americans, like to believe is the basis of our country.

What comes to mind when you think of Abraham Lincoln? If you're anything like me, first is a picture of his noble, craggy face. Next is an image of the log cabin in which he supposedly was born. While it is true that he was born in a log cabin, the actual cabin, much like Washington's cherry tree, is the stuff of myth. That humble little log cabin has become a symbol of that American icon: a man of humble beginnings, proof that if you work hard and follow your dreams, anything is possible.

There is a tourist attraction representing the cabin but no one pretends it's the real thing. It's a facsimile and is enclosed inside a miniature Greek temple. One account I read described the temple as "pure and serene and utterly unrelated to the historical Lincoln". The temple has sixteen columns, representing the fact that Lincoln was our sixteenth president, and fifty-six steps representing the years of Lincoln's life. The closest they dare claim to authenticity was to say that there is a possibility that some of the logs might have come from the site of his actual birthplace. It other words, it's a symbol, a myth.

Does the fact that these stories are not true lessen their importance? I don't think so. They are part of our heritage, fantasies we have molded from fact to remind us who we are and what we aspire to be. They are stories to pass down through the generations in the hope that the values they represent will be an inspiration for our children and grandchildren, and, equally important, to ourselves.

February is for Fairy Tales

by Victoria M. Johnson

You know those popular holidays in February.  But you may not know about my new discovery, Fairy Tale Day is celebrated on February 26.

Many of us can remember the earliest stories that were read to us by family or teachers.  Some of them were scary—those with unkind lessons for bad decision-making.  Some were magical—those with fantastical characters and settings.  Either way, these tales were likely the first books we learned to read and they usually have happy endings.  It's no wonder we love them!

photo by Anthony Tran

How to celebrate National Fairy Tale Day:

1.  Reacquaint yourself with your favorite childhood tales.  Pull them off your shelf or visit your library or bookstore.  Do you still have your original fairy tale books on your shelves?  Cuddle up with your beverage of choice and enjoy.

2.  Read to a child.  Your own or someone else's.  Get into the role and voice of each character. Muddy Days Blog has other great ideas to ignite the imaginations of youngsters on Fairy Tale Day.

3.  Watch a fairy tale movie.  Animated or live action, films such as The Princess Bride, Beauty and the Beast, or Mirror Mirror will be time well spent.  Don't forget the popcorn.

4.  Throw a fairy tale party.  Just add friends to any of the above ways to celebrate.  You can all dress up as fairy tale characters.

5.  Write your own fairy tale.  You knew this was coming.  Why not try your hand at a fairy tale based story?  Poets & Writers magazine offers tips.   

Celebrate your way.  I'm wishing you your own happily ever after. 

Victoria M. Johnson knew by the time she was ten that she wanted to be a writer.  She loves telling stories and she's happiest when creating new characters and new plots.  Avalon Books and Montlake Romance published Victoria's fiction debut, The Doctor’s Dilemma.  Her other fiction book is a collection of romance short stories titled, The Substitute Bride and a novella, Hot Hawaiian Christmas. She is also the writer and director of four short films and two micro documentaries.   Visit Victoria's website at http://VictoriaMJohnson.com for inspiration and tips and find her Amazon author page or connect with her on Pinterest and Twitter.

Fantasy, Myth and Formula

by Janis Susan May/Janis Patterson

Several wise people have said that it is neither politicians nor warriors who shape a culture - it is the mythmakers, the creators of legends. In other words, it is us. The writers.

Laws might made by politicians and warriors, but the hearts and minds and beliefs of a people are created and fostered by the stories they read. For example, how many of our cultural beliefs have deep roots in legends and fairy tales? I think pretty much all of them. Even  the concept of a Happily Ever After comes from a legion of fairy tales all the way from Cinderella (the earliest known telling of which comes from the Old Kingdom of Ancient Egypt) to Nora Roberts and her fellow romance authors. The happy ending is by no means guaranteed in real life, yet we know we can always find one in a romance novel and that always makes us feel better.

It's the same with mystery novels. Some people wonder why, in this world of crazy behavior and rampant crime, anyone would voluntarily read a book in which fictional examples of the same take place. The answer is simple - because we know before we even open the book that justice will prevail. Not necessarily the law, I hasten to add, for the two are often not synonymous. When the novel is finished, the bad guys should be taken care of and societal balance not only returned but positively reaffirmed. If a writer is so injudicious as ignore this tradition, the backlash can be dangerous. Readers want their world tidied.

So how do you keep the ancient formula fresh? This was discussed on one of my writers' lists, and the answers were occasionally startling. Everything was suggested from reversing the sexes of the hero/heroine to putting the story on an alien planet with a bunch of non-human characters. All of these ideas had a certain viability that an experienced writer could pull off handily, but the discussion ignored the most important part... that the formula itself does not have to be freshened. The formula is a constant, no matter what costumes it wears.

For romance it is one character meets another character, there is an attraction, there are problems, the problems are solved and there is a happy ending. This formula doesn't vary what sex which character is or what the problems are or where the story is set, as long as everything is satisfactorily resolved and the two main characters have a happy ending. The rest is all just set dressing.

It's the same with mysteries - there is a protagonist, there is a crime, the protagonist solves the crime incurring no little risk/danger to himself and in the end all things are resolved in a satisfactory way. Perhaps the real world may be going to hell in a handbasket, but within the pages of a mystery novel the reader knows that justice will always prevail.

Sometimes knowing how things will end is the most desirable thing. That's why formulas have always existed and always will.