For Better or Worse by Fran McNabb

            Who doesn’t like to read about love? Since many of the authors on this loop are romance writers and many of our readers love romance, I chose a topic today that I think we can all relate to. 

            When couples marry, they have the best of intentions. They are in love. They want to be with each other every minute of the day and night. They want to make the other person happy. “New love” is wonderful and exhilarating, but time has a way of stripping away the excitement in a marriage. The wonder and exhilaration fades and slowly turns to quiet familiarity. Good marriages with couples who are truly in love settle into this familiarity and enjoy life as each year turns into the next.
 

            But what happens when one of the partners becomes ill. Illnesses like cancer and Alzheimer take away the joys that couples work for in marriages. These illnesses have a way of turning life upside down, inside out, and stretching patience and physical abilities to the limits.

            Several of our friends are dealing with horrible illnesses in their marriages. Their lives are continuing, but the normalcy in those lives is gone. Life revolves around doctor appointments, medicines, chemo, and uncertain futures. Life isn’t easy, but when love is present, couples accept and give to the other.

             We recently had company from an old classmate and his wife who has Alzheimer.  The love I witnessed warmed my heart. She still clings to him as her remembered love, but she also needs him as her caregiver. Life is not easy for either of them. She knows her condition is making life difficult for him, but he seems never to complain. Instead he goes about the daily chore of taking care of her needs, both physical and emotional. Watching the two of them is a testimony of what real love involves.

             When couples say the words “for better or worse,” I’m sure the “worse” is not what they expect, but it can happen and does happen all too many times. My husband and I said the words over forty-four years ago and so far we have been blessed. We haven’t had to deal with horrible medical situations like some of our friends have.

            Love is such a strong emotion, and for couples who are facing a life with a sick mate, I pray that their love is strong enough to help find the light during their darkest days. Young love is a wonderful thing, but what we’ll call “old love” is even more wonderful. Sitting next to a partner in a

doctor’s waiting room, holding hands to give the other support, or simply sitting quietly on a porch taking in the last rays of sunlight and remembering easier times—these may not be exciting moments, but they are wonderful moments that show the love and support that the words “for better or worse” mean.

Fran McNabb grew up on the Gulf Coast and now lives on a quiet bayou harbor with her husband. They love to spend time on the water fishing and visiting the nearby islands or traveling to see their two sons and grandsons. Visit Fran at www.FranMcNabb.com or write to her at mcnabbf@bellsouth.net.