Life Goes On

by Janis Susan May/Janis Patterson

Okay, take a deep breath. We have survived the Christmas crazies and the New Year's excesses; since it's after Twelfth Night, all the Christmas decorations should be packed away for next December and probably most of us have already broken the ambitious New Year's Resolutions we have made.

It's time for normal (whatever that is!) life to begin again. Some of us have already returned to our jobs. 2019 is a blank slate, ready for us to fill in for good or for ill.

The prospect is terrifying. There is only so much time and yet so many things that cry to be done. We have families who must be attended to and enjoyed. We have jobs that need to be done, whether day jobs in the business world or the job of running a home or whatever. We have civic duties. We have.... You get the idea; everyone's life is different in details, but the same in so many ways.

So how do we do it all? The answer to that is as individual as we are. Speaking only of the writing part of our lives, we must write. And edit. And re-write, sometimes ad nauseam. Add to that research, and the necessity of giving some thought to our next project, and that bête noir of every writer I know, publicity. All the above apply - in various proportions - whether we are traditionally, self or hybrid published, whether we are a full time or a part time writer.

I read on one of the writers' chat loops that several writers spend up to 50% of their writing time on publicity. Somehow that seems so wrong. We should be writers, not publicity hacks. I know that If I wanted to spend that much time dealing with publicity and such I would have stayed in advertising - and be making a lot more money!

I know there are loads of publicity services available, all with different pricing structures. Most - dare I say all? - are out of my price range. I have a stubborn refusal to spend more on publicity than I am making. It is illogical, to quote Mr. Spock.

It's late for making Christmas wishes, but if I were allowed one it would be that some enterprising person would start a publicity service that even those of us who don't have a lot of money - read 'very little' - could afford. Think of what we could do with all that creative time! And even if the prices were kept quite low, think of how much money that publicity person could make. It would be a win-win situation.

As for the writing itself, I have long said that writers work pretty much 24/7. Even if we go days without touching a keyboard, somewhere in our brains there is a part that whirrs and thumps and wrestles with storylines - even if we are sometimes totally unaware of it. Ideas and wording and plots don't come from thin air; they are lured into the open air by hard work, creativity and skill. There is no magic shortcut, darn it.

Neither is there a magic formula. Some writers write a set number of words or hours every day in rigid discipline. Others write only when their 'muse' dictates. Others write in unbelievable multi-day explosions of creativity, putting aside every other consideration. There is no absolutely 'correct' way. Neither is there a completely consistent way, no matter what style of writing one chooses. There is family, there is illness, there are unexpected emergencies... all commonly called 'life,' and writers must work around them. And somehow we all manage.

It's called life, and life does go on.

Save Your Marriage Using Romance Novels

by Victoria M. Johnson

I have been an avid reader of romance novels for years and years.  I suppose you could say that I'm addicted to happy endings.  I have my favorite authors and subgenres of course, but it's always a pleasure discovering new authors and new tips for keeping romance alive.

Tips?  What kind of tips, you ask.

Well, one day I began noticing that authors, through their characters in romance novels, were revealing great relationship tips.  You can also call them advice or guidelines for a happy life.  Actually, once I started looking for these gems, I found dozens.  So many, in fact, that I wrote a motivational nonfiction book to share and celebrate the wisdom found in romances.

Below are snippets from three chapters of that book, All I Need to Know in Life I Learned From Romance Novels. These small excerpts are examples of truths I found on finding and keeping romance alive and well.

If you don't treat your partner right, someone else will

There are three rules for writing a successful romance novel: Focus on the relationship. Focus on the relationship. Focus on the relationship. I think it’s a great motto for marriage, too. With all the deadbeats out there, a good man will be snatched up by another woman before you have time to change the sheets.  Good men truly are hard to find.  If you have a good one, don't take him for granted.  There are women out there who want to steal your man away from you. They are conniving and plotting at this moment.  We’ve seen it, read about it, maybe experienced it; we know that it happens.  So what can we do to protect our unsuspecting men from the clutches of these enticing predators? What do our heroines do?

They put their highest effort into what matters to them.  The heroine does not act half-heartedly in anything.  This includes interactions with the hero.  The hero and heroine are always in touch.  The developing relationship is meaningful to them.  Let your mate know how important your relationship is to you.  And consider another writing maxim: show, don’t tell.

Whining isn't attractive

Whining annihilates romantic interest faster than finding a mouse in your bed.  People don’t appreciate listening to a whiner. And why should they? Everyone has problems. Whining is unromantic, unheroic, and downright useless. You’ll never hear a heroine whine. She may protest or point out negatives, but her challenge gets results, inspires action. No matter the heavy load she carries, she perseveres. As for the hero, you’ll never hear a real man snivel.  He may argue or be bullheaded, of course.  His riled conduct gets his point across, persuades.  No matter how down on his luck the hero is, he maintains his dignity.  Whatever they have been through, the hero and heroine don’t feel sorry for themselves.  They do something to change their circumstances.

Never trust anything a woman who has her eye on your man tells you

Distrust is like lava pouring out of a volcano, as it destroys everything it encounters.  Reading about it is much better than living it.  Though, sometimes, in spite of how much we trust someone, the evidence does incriminate him.  How do we forestall evil forces from entering our lives? Here are suggestions derived from romance novel heroines.

First, look at the motives of the person who casually mentions unpleasant “facts” about your partner.  Ask yourself, what does she have to gain?  Why is she telling you this; is it to inform, hurt, or warn?  Second, ignore the messenger’s advice and follow your own instincts.  Third, look at the situation from all sides, particularly your mate’s.  Maybe the hussy exaggerated.  Fourth, talk to him, if warranted.

The book (originally published in hardcover, now only available as an ebook) has 29 chapters of intriguing observations.  Other chapters for living a fulfilling romantic life include: If you stand around waiting for a man, you'll be alone for a long time; Attitude makes all the difference; Communication is the key to a healthy relationship; and The secret to hot sex is trust.

All I Need to Know in Life I Learned FromRomance Novels is the perfect companion for romance novel loyalists.  In it you'll discover how to apply the wisdom of romance novels in your own life.  Whether you're happily single, very married, or looking for someone special, I think you'll learn something beneficial while being entertained.  I wish you all a romantic Valentine's Day and I truly hope you find your own happy ending. 

Victoria M. Johnson knew by the time she was ten that she wanted to be a writer.  She loves telling stories and she's happiest when creating new characters and new plots.  Avalon Books and Montlake Romance published Victoria's fiction debut, The Doctor’s Dilemma, (A 2012 Bookseller’s Best double finalist).  Her other fiction book is a collection of romance short stories titled, The Substitute Bride and a novella, Hot Hawaiian Christmas. She is also the writer and director of four short films and two micro documentaries.   Visit Victoria's website at http://VictoriaMJohnson.com for inspiration and tips and find her Amazon author page or connect with her on Pinterest and Twitter.

Be It Resolved...

by Janis Susan May/Janis Patterson

Sometimes I think if I hear/see/read one more thing about New Year’s Resolutions I will scream. Every January 1 we’re supposed to completely change our lives, remake ourselves and institute completely new thought patterns. Then, being human, when we slip, backslide or otherwise fail, we are depressed and return to our old ways or worse. Small wonder New Year’s Resolutions have in many ways become a bad joke.

This year I’ve beat the system. I’ve made only one resolution, and that one I am sure to keep. I resolved to make no resolutions! Which is an insoluble conundrum, I know, but logic has never been my strong point.

Resolutions have always unnerved me somehow. I am a very stubborn person and once I say something I will move Heaven and earth to keep my word. Two years ago I vowed to put my publishing career into high gear after far too many years of futzing around. I did it, and it bloody near killed me. Since May of 2014 I have been working non-stop, publishing I-don’t-know-how-many-books (including one release every two weeks for five months!) with never any less than three writing projects going on at a time. I traveled to Egypt to research a book, then to Boston, Alabama and Las Vegas to research other projects. I did mountains of publicity (which I loathe) and blogged a lot – pretty much any time anyone would let me in addition to my standing days. I spoke at several prestigious conferences and attended even more conferences, some for me and some for The Husband. I kept our house and made a home for The Husband, did some teaching and dealt with several family crises. And that’s just what I can remember now.

I’m tired.

So did it work? Was it worth it? I dunno. My sales have been fairly good, but not anywhere near what I want them to be. My name is known in the industry, and I think I have a pretty good reputation. I haven’t had the lightning strike of luck yet, but no resolution, New Year’s or not, is going to change that.

All of which has brought me to a decision. I’m going to slow down. I’m going to enjoy life more. I’m going to pay more attention to my home and my family and my animals. I may even clean out my kitchen cabinets. (On the other hand, I may not – don’t need to get TOO carried away!) I’ll still write, and publish, and speak, and pretty much do everything I’ve been doing, but just not so much of it.

I need to remember to put more emphasis on making a life instead of making a living.

(PS - for those of you who were interested in my newsletter, there is now a sign-up form available on my website!) 

Teaching an Old Dog

by Gina Ardito

Tomorrow's my birthday. I'll be (gasp!) 53. Spare me the comments about how I don't look my age. I don't mention the day because I'm fishing for compliments. What I really wanted to say is that, even at my (venerable) age, I still have to remain flexible with fate. Because fate seems to love jerking my chain. I'm officially an old dog still learning new tricks.

Life never remains constant. Today is my last day at a job I've had for more than a decade. I've been in this industry for four decades and starting Monday, I'll be trying my wings at something else. No longer will I be able to joke that I work for Satan (health insurance, so yeah, it ain't too far from the truth).

Two days from now, I'll be dropping my youngest child off at college and will come home to a much quieter house (but with more food in it).

I honestly didn't expect 2015 to be the year of so much change (there's more, but it's not my story to tell. Suffice it to say, the last six months have thrown my family topsy-turvy in many ways). But it seems that's just how it happens. You're moving along on your usual path, and suddenly, you hit a detour. You negotiate that turn, and there's another up ahead. And another. Until when you look up again, you realize your path has led you somewhere entirely different than where you thought you'd be.

In "The Princess Bride," Westley, in his Dread Pirate Roberts persona, tells Buttercup, "Life is pain." I beg to differ. Life is change. The days we'll remember when we're looking back are not the days where we got up, went to work, came home, did some chores, watched a little TV and went to bed. We'll recall the milestones: the days that were different, the days that changed us. The birth of children, the death of loved ones, trips and vacations, the end of or respite from the usual grind. 

Go ahead, fate. I'm ready.

As John Lennon sang in Beautiful Boy, "Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans."

Enjoy your life, my friends. Live it fully, no matter where it takes you.

My Birthday Wish...To You

by Gina Ardito

Today's my birthday. How convenient that it's also my day to blog here at Classic And Cozy. Never mind how old I am. Let's just say, I passed the half-century mark a few years ago and leave it at that. With all those birthdays behind me, I have no need for additional gifts. Instead, I'd like to give all of you my birthday wish. I wish for you:

Books you can't put down.

Time to read them.

A cozy spot.

Love.

Laughter.

Good health. 

Magic moments.

People to share it all with.

Know joy. Embrace love. Give to others. Never stop learning. These are the keys to a life well-lived.

P.S.: To begin this wish, I've put my most recent release, REUNION IN OCTOBER, on free download from Amazon for Kindle this week. Beginning today through August 24. You can download your copy here.